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18th August 2022 

How I work as counsellor, psychotherapist and conflict coach

As a counsellor I provide a space to listen to your problems and try to see it from your point of view. Then we will work together to explore whether, what and how to make changes. This approach can be short term or long term and will be used e.g. when you have a dilemma at work or find it difficult to deal with a specific situation in your private life. Counselling would also be used if you had a bereavement and you wanted to talk through your feelings and thoughts with a person outside the family setting who gives you time and space to consider how the loss is affecting you.

Conflict Coaching is a one-to-one approach in which I as the coach would help you to explore your approach to conflict and how to get out of the conflict cycle. The approach is based on the nine principles of effective communication. Whereas counselling works with the client/therapist relationship, conflict coaching focusses entirely on your experience, and I would only use your words without interpreting what else might be going on. It provides the space for reflection to gain insight into your contribution to conflict. This is a short term approach.

Psychotherapy usually takes longer than counselling and goes deeper into your past and your underlying issues, e.g. low self esteem or deep rooted anxiety or depression. Again, you will be listened to and I will engage with you and your values, helping you to find the relevant solutions to move forward in life and lead a more fulfilled and happy life. One client said after 18 sessions: " I wish I had met you 20years earlier. My life could have been very different had I been aware of all the choices I had."

In couples therapy, I will encourage both partners to explore the relationship as it is experienced by each individual and how each partner wants it to develop. This is usually achieved by facilitating respectful and honest communication before deeper issues can be explored. To find out more about the centre I attended for the couple course just click here to go straight to it.

Recently I have attended specialist training to cure traumas (of the past - not ongoing traumas!), panic attacks, PTSD and phobias quickly (within 2-3 sessions) and successfully (3 out of 4 clients are symptom free after the treatment). The first session would serve to assess whether this particular approach is suitable for you and the experience you want to put behind you and make you familiar with the technique that will be used. In the second session the treatment would take place (a combination of guided visualisation and relaxation)and in the third session we would look at how the treatment has worked for you. If you want to know more about this treatment feel free to send me an email or check it out on the website of "Human Givens" and the Mindfield College.

PEP is an advanced version of EFT or Tapping. It is another very useful and easy to learn technique to treat all kinds of issues, in particular phobias (flight, animals, height etc.), panic attacks, OCD and low self esteem. Sometimes symptoms can be cured in one session and other times it can take a few weeks. It is a technique you will learn with me and then use whenever and wherever you need it. It is fast, easy, unintrusive and will bring relief from your symptoms!

Overall my idea about therapy is:
I want to help you to help yourself, empower you to engage with your real self and encourage you to keep up the motivation.
My hope is to achieve this through listening and talking, creative interventions and education in psychological concepts. I have learned that there is no "one fits all" approach and I try to tailor the therapy to the individual client's needs. We all have relational needs and where I can't fulfill needs that have not been met in the past, I can help you to identify these needs and any gaps. By providing a "good enough" relational experience I can fulfill some of these needs in the sessions so you can experience what it feels like to be atuned with someone on quite a deep meaningful level.

I trained with Cascade (supervision training for counsellors) and offer individual and group supervision for qualified therapists from all training backgrounds. My aim is to offer support and challenge so that you can provide ethically sound and confident services to your clients. At the moment, I supervise individuals in my private practice as well as groups and individuals from organisations such as Cruse Bereavement Care and Catalyst Support (previously SADAS), an alcohol and drugs counselling service.

Carmen von Haenisch | phone: 07900 194549 | Email: